Alright, I'm going OBS tmr! I know it might be physically and even mentally challenging but bring it on! What ching said made sense. I'm probably only gonna do this once in my lifetime, since if I were to go there in the future I would need to look for my own instructor etc etc which is a pretty tedious process. So now that the school has provided this opportunity for us, I should treasure it? Haha go there with an open mind and leave all the stress and everything from the past few months behind in Singapore! (oh wait a min, isn't pulau ubin a part of singapore too, LOL?)

Although I don't really know any of my group watch mates I'm sure it would still be alright! Like since idk when, I have always been thrown into an environment where idk anyone there and am supposed to start afresh and get to know more people? Haha I guess this isn't such a bad thing either :P JIAYOUS WATCH 15! we will have fun these few days together hehe (: kayaking, rope climbing, trekking etc etc.

Oh yes, I really hope the mosquitoes and sand flies don't see anything in me :X just treat me as enemy and stay faraway Shoo ._. I really really really do not want those scars which some of my friends got back as 'souvenirs' from OBS omg :X haha, and yeah in case anyone texts me, pls be aware that my phone is left comfortably in my house! I can't bear to bring it to OBS to weather the whole camp with me hee. Anyways, it will just get confiscated so might as well leave it at home? LOL.

So yepp, I'm gonna sleep soon coz I think I would really need that energy? See ya phone in four days time and in the meantime, wish me luck in suriving! I WILL make it home alive and happy (of course craving for a good bath) but yes, basically contented (:

--
'Fice frogs are sitting on a log, 4 decide to jump off. How many are left? Answer: 5. Why? Because deciding & doing are not the same thing' (something I got from twitter and felt that it kinda makes sense :) So yes, my decision, my choice to view OBS in an optimistic way. So now it's time to make those thoughts into actions :D

the next few weeks are gonna be crazy for me. in one week's time, i'm gonna get thrown into OBS, and try my best to survive at pulau ubin. (i guess the winner will be the person who comes back to SG alive i mean with the least mosquito/sand fly bites LOL) not meaning to sound bimbo but BEWARE sand fly bites can cause scars if you scratch them. SCREW. and it has been a long time since i last slept outdoors? (in some sleeping bag/ tent, sounds romantic? yehps -.-)

after OBS it's electives week! idk but i'm the only one in my class going for that elective. seems quite lonely and sigh, i really dunno what to expect. >< it would be fun yes? it's just a report which i need to complete by the end of the 3 days. (which kinda reminds me of my geog report. hmmm.. DAMN THE WATER. WHY CAN'T IT FLOW DOWN INTO THE GROUND MORE QUICKLY?? D<) and at the very least i get to enter the school's nanoscience lab? which according to some people are kinda 'out of bounds' in a sense LOL unless you are involved in some research project.

then POP. time really flies. i can still remember in sec 1 when i first received my CCA results i was like literally freaking out. the naive me was shocked to have gotten to the CCA of her last choice! she was still thinking, or should i say imagining, that everything in the world would go according to her way. as though this was her world and she was the ruler of it LOL. she wanted to quit, just get out of it since for one, she was the only one in her class from that CCA. and two, it sounded -yawns- but luckily, sth changed that all.

she first started enjoying this CCA when she met friends through the house system which she's thankful for in her CCA. she found out that perhaps there was this other side to her CCA and it was not all about training, training and more training to improve skills. there was sth else apart from gaining new knowledge and she was starting to feel attached! so yes, that was the first step she/ I took and in the blink of an eye, this whole journey is about to end.

yes, there were many times which she/I (it's difficult to write in third person D<) really felt very tired, jaded or whatsoever you call it but i cannot deny the fact that i do feel kinda proud that we have pulled through, endured and came out of those situations alive (and kicking LOL).  I know when i look back in the future, this pride and sense of satisfaction will still be there no matter what. at least i did things which i have never done so in my entire life in this CCA, no matter how stupid, absurd and out of the world. (: the 30 people (used to be 34 at first?), one squad one spirit.

i know i may not be the most outstanding member in the CCA (definitely not the best in terms of hard skills too) but i don't think i have wasted my time here. apart from the first aid skills learnt (and all the other stuff), the experience and lessons learnt are already :O for example in year 1 i learnt that not everyone shares the same perspective as you. to you, it might seem as a joke but to others, something serious.yehps. and ooh, blogs are never private LOL. in year 2, decisions. the choices you make, will definitely affect you -- inflicting damage/causing regrets or bringing out the pride and joy in you. sulk or smile, sink or swim. MY choice. and in year 3, i remember it so clearly. running away never solves a problem. it just causes more and more trouble ._. yeaps, the belt & the parade but not to forget, the person who stood by me throughout the whole thing <3 without her, turning back, despite all the trouble she knew she was about to subject herself to, she still decided to help. till this day, i'm still thankful and so grateful for that act. THANK YOU VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY MUCHHH and i'm so sorry for that day as well ):

and lastly in year 4. this year, i'm starting to get involved in quite a lot of other stuff and somehow i think i'm not really contributing that much, which is kinda selfish in a sense. 人不为己，天诛地灭. i have been seeing this saying quite a lot of times this year and i admit, i think there are quite a few occasions when i chose myself , chose personal benefits instead of you know.. sacrifice? yeahps, i shall not bother defending myself but i think this will be one of the regrets hmmm. still thinking if i should post this as it is really quite personal ._.

basically i think this is my reflection for the past 4 years of my CCA life. all i wanna say is sorry i am and i can't be perfect but as much i have enjoyed being in this squad, i hope i did alright. and in case you are wondering why i posted this so early, this is because i'm afraid i wouldn't have time to complete this reflection and would miss the chance to 'say' this as i will be leaving right after POP to UK. there's only less than a month left and i know this sounds cliche.

"i will be there when the world stops turning, i will be there when the storm is through, in the end i wanna be standing at the beginning with youuu~" thanks for the memories :D

Suddenly I'm really affected by stereotypes. Yes, it's inevitable that one judges a book by it's cover and first impression counts but don't everyone deserve a second chance as well? And what makes you think you deserve the right to judge? Arent you trying to act as a self-proclaimed one? That's what I dislike about this whole system. Everyone's making judgments too quickly. Most of all, for pragmatic reasons.

I cannot say I'm not a person who dispises practicality but there's always a limit. Everything when at its extreme is never good. Everything seriously. Even fighting for animal rights. Should we be letting domestic animals run freely in public? Will they be able to survive without any restrictions to their population growth? Even the idea of 'freedom of speech'. There must be a boundary, a thin line, basically a limit to every single thing.

So gosh, isn't it a little early to be making your claims and predictions? You are definitely not a fortune teller and pls know that all these claims will actually affect someone's feelings, and others' views of that person. The pain of being wronged, accused, mistaken and it's all your fault. So stop it, and wake up you Screwed Judgemental Person. ):

Everytime I try to fly, I fall

yes, i survived this week and WHEE HEE, a break this weekend finally? okay maybe not completely a break but something close to that already deserves to be cherished. this week has been a crazy week but nonetheless i survived! all the tests and presentations. LA PW presentation was kinda.. weird? we didn't get to present in front of all 3 classes which i think it's quite unfair? as in other groups might think we have an edge but let me tell you, i don't think that's true. trust me.


aside from LA, we completed our chemistry busking presentation yesterday! OMG, IT WAS SUPER EMBARRASSING. (and crazy.) the only other time when i totally threw away my face like that was probably in shanghai during the skit presentation. somehow i think i have grown braver after the experience. it's like literally "经一事，长一智?" okay pardon me if the use of this 谚语 is wrong :P

A noob’s name for paracentemol 

The pill is disturbing and pink

Formed by phenol – a changed benzene

Some sort of hydrocarbon right?

That Em kills your pain and sets you right

Between the lines of cramps and throbs

You begin to wonder how it forms

CHORUS:

You start with phenol, add HNO3

Somewhere along it forms nitrotoluene

And orthro –nitrotoluene is removed by

distillation – we say goodCbye

para nitrotoluene is reduced by 

sodium tetrahydridoborate 

Actylated, menstrual panadol

yepps haha so i guess it's pretty easy to guess what we presented on? but no matter what happened out there, i do admit that i did have fun ^^ all the epic practices and OMG, just the brainstorming process was hilarious enough. thanks guys. (:

--

it was surely a night, to be remembered. 

yawns, next week's gonna be a long week really. esp wednesday. i think i can just lay down on the floor and fall asleep after 1645 this wednesday. SS (survive sabbie) you can do it :D had fun yesterday at EDS night! awesome ttm (: haha gonna be a super short post as i seriously need to do some hard mugging. been slacking too much lately? LOL.